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DEAR ABBY: My 38-year-old son is in jail for meth. He's been an addict for many years. I tried several times to help him, but he always relapsed. He has been in rehab. His mother and I divorced when he was 7. He was a great kid until the divorce. After that, he became distant and wouldn't talk much to me. His mother tried to make up for the divorce by doing everything for him. When I wanted him to do something, like his homework, he would just sit and stare. I couldn't punish him because I was afraid he wouldn't want to come to my place when it was my weekend to have him. I did things with him and tried to show him I loved him, but I think he blamed me for the divorce. (It was my wife who wanted it.) I don't think he ever loved me like a son normally loves his father, the way I loved and respected mine. He rejected any advice I tried to offer and paid no attention when I tried to teach him something. I'm trying to decide if I want to contact him. I feel like I have always had to do the heavy lifting to try to have a relationship with him, and he made no effort at all to sustain one with me. If I never heard from him again, I really wouldn't miss him. All he has ever been is a taker. So I'm asking: Should I bother trying to get in contact with him while he is in jail? -- FRUSTRATED FATHER IN TEXAS
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DEAR ABBY: I'm a lesbian. My girlfriend and I have been together for a couple of months now. We fell in love quickly and we're getting ready to move in together. I'm really excited about it, but an "incident" happened recently while we were spending time together. We were watching TV, and I noticed she was on a website looking at women wearing bikinis. At first I thought, "Are you serious? Right in front of me?" So I looked over and asked her about it. She looked back at me and said, "What?" It made me feel incredibly insecure. I know she loves me, but she doesn't understand how hurt I was seeing that. It made me feel like I'm not enough. What should I tell her? Should I break up with her? Or am I wrong to feel this way? -- TORN IN SOUTH CAROLINA
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“You’ll never guess what I did!” my husband, Peter, announced.
Read moreDEAR HARRIETTE: My friend has been struggling to give up cigarettes for years. I thought that watching her aunt die from lung cancer a few years ago would be a wake-up call, but she hasn’t slowed down at all. I’m nervous for her, but I’m afraid to intervene because she always gets defensive and calls me judgmental when I say something about her habit. How can I make her understand that quitting would be in her best interest? -- Stop Smoking
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ASK THE DOCTORS by Eve Glazier, M.D., and Elizabeth Ko, M.D. Dear Doctors: I have been stress eating during the pandemic. That includes plenty of junk food, unfortunately, and I’ve gained 15 pounds. I’m sure it has been bad for my gut microbiome, and I want to do a reset. How do you eat for your gut to be healthier?
Read moreFully functional headlights are an important safety feature on cars and trucks. While halogen bulbs were common in the past, modern vehicles now largely utilize high intensity discharge (HID) bulbs or light-emitting diodes (LEDs). HIDs work similarly to fluorescent bulbs by passing an electric current through an inert gas in a glass cylinder. LEDs are semiconductors that emit light when powered by an electric current. LEDs and HIDs are now used because they are efficient and last longer. These headlights quickly replaced halogen bulbs as the industry standard, but many drivers have lamented that they are increasingly feeling blinded by headlight glare. In March 2020, the Ford Motor Company recalled several F-150s because their headlights were too bright. According to Donut Media, an American automotive content brand, the typical halogen bulb puts out 1,300 lumens of light and the average LED emits 1,600 lumens. But HIDs can emit up to 3,000 lumens. Popu-lar Science magazine also says HID and LED head- lights are a different color temperature than halogens. These newer lights put out whiter and bluer light. Human eyes are very sen- sitive to blue light, so these blue-white bulbs automat- ically seem brighter even when they're not emitting more lumens, according to PowerBulbs reports. Head- lights also are supposed to be positioned correctly at a certain angle to reduce blinding glare. People who replace their own bulbs may not be doing so correctly.
Read moreIt's important that individuals heed evacuation warnings when such recommendations are issued, as studies of past natural disasters illustrate the effectiveness of evacuations. According to a joint report from the United States Department of Health and Human Services and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 52.5 percent of drowning deaths directly related to Hurricane Sandy, the deadliest and most destructive storm of the 2012 Atlantic hurricane season, occurred in the home. Nearly all of the homes where those deaths occurred were within evacuation zones, which means many of them could have been prevented had individuals chosen to evacuate when orders were issued. Studies have found that people ignore evacuation orders for a wide range of reasons, including the cost of evacuating and past experiences during previous storms that gives a false perception that the storm will not be that bad. However, as technology has advanced, public safety officials are now more capable than ever at gauging the characteristics of oncoming storms, including the dangers they pose. That should be enough to compel individuals, even those who have long lived in areas vulnerable to storms like hurricanes, to evacuate when their local officials urge them to do so.
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